Sometimes, what is better than a two parter is a three parter (though I’m doubting now that ‘parter’ is in fact an actual word, shame on me) or sometimes, its just a matter of having the right conversations with the right people. This is something I am grateful for, the women I am surrounded by in life, at work, serve as great blogspiration, especially when the conversation comes to dating, so with that, here is the third and final (maybe) in the dating definitions space:
The sequel: I know, I know, I just went on and on about how a three parter is better than a two parter shame on me. Sometimes however, the sequel is all you need, and can be even better than the original, but of course it is all a matter of perspective. The first time around the sun with said partner can be blissful or a total dud, making a go of it again, you are either Pollyanna or a sadist. Sequels often make for great stories, serving as urban legends for singles also contemplating a second go with an X, you know the kind, my friend has a friend who has a friend who went back with her X and it was great! They were engaged 3 months later, and living in the suburbs and pregnant within a year! This is like my worst nightmare realized. Suburbs, really?
The cling on: When I was living at the dorms in UVIC (Go Vikes!) we had a term for girls who seemed to attract questionable characters- swiffers. Though it wasn’t their fault – I think we have all been swiffers at one point, regardless of whether or not you might have frequented the boom boom room or legends (Victoria folks, you’re nodding right now aren’t you? Bless). The cling on gets picked up often by mistake and often disguised as something more promising, and before you know it you just want it to be over. So over. The next thing you know you’re changing your phone number, moving to a foreign country or faking an incurable disease.
The hibernator: This is a tricky one, because you likely met in a relatively social situation (not in his dodgy rental) but as time goes on, you’re just not going out. It’s always ‘lets hang out here’, ‘I’m so tired’, I saw people all week’- all of which are UNTRUE. Why? well because from his instagram stories you know he basically hung out at home all week playing with his new DJ equipment and watching bad made for TV movies. Exhausting.
The faux: ‘What are you talking about? We aren’t dating.’ Yet you spend every Saturday perusing St Lawrence Market for the dinner you are cooking together on Saturday night. He’s your plus one at weddings, and you might have just bought a condo together (for investment purposes only) but, god no, you’re not dating.
The bandaid: aka ‘I can’t be single, ever’- sometimes the saddest hook up of them all, you’re always going through a breakup, but in tadem you’re also in a new relationship, if that’s what you can call it. In reality, its a matter of slapping on a good old bandaid to mask what is actually going on with bachelor number one. No good can come of this, eventually you’ve got to rip it off, and god forbid he’s a cling on, make sure you’ve got that passport renewed for your impending move to Algeria.
There you have it folks, your dating definitions trilogy… thought I have to think this list is still not exhaustive, maybe the only thing better than a three parter is a four parter……